Thursday, March 24, 2011

How to Annoy Natalie 101

So I know I live in the year 2011 and most people text more than they talk in their phones, but I have a serious bone to pick with texting messaging when it comes to dating.

Hello Soap Box, let me step on you for a minute. There is not anything that annoys me more in this whole world than a guy that asks out over text message. I mean, if you don't have the balls to pick up the phone and dial my number, you don't have enough balls to date me. I can be a tough cookie. And well, if you have to hide behind the screen of your phone and first send flirty/somewhat inappropriate text messages to gauge my interest in you before you do something about it - then you should just put down the phone and back away slowly.

This is a direct transcript of a text conversation I had last night. I have put my thoughts in red for your reading enjoyment. Also, I have given this guy the game of George. Just because I don't know any George's. And for the record, I actually think this guy is cute. He has potential.

10:35 PM
George: What are you doing? Really? at 10:30 at night? I'm not answering this text

5 minutes later:
George: That was a joke. What's going on? You ready for the Y game tomorrow?
Me: If you mean am I ready to watch the Y lose and put and end to this Jimmer mania crap? Then yes...very ready!
George: Wow. My bad.
Me: Oh come on, don't cry about it
George: (he tried to apparently message me on Facebook) Do you know how to use your computer? I invite you over all the time but you never come. Not sure how I should feel about that. For the record, I have only received mass text messages from him and maybe 1 phone call but they have all been past 9:00 pm. I get annoyed at the latest of his invites so I don't respond.
Me: I am not sure how I feel about getting fake invites from you at 10:30 at night
George: I'll make it worth your while. Oh really? We're getting to this level of insinuating now? I'm not going to bite. This conversation is going nowhere but downhill fast if I respond with an equally as flirty text.
Me: That's funny because I don't actually remember getting an invite
George: That is funny. I thought i invited you over thirty minutes ago.
Me: OH! Was your invite "what are you doing"..then following by "that was a joke?" I can't believe i didn't see that as an invite!
George: Yea, i guess that wasn't very smooth. I'll have to work on it.
George: We should really get out and do something sometime. and i'm not joking or giving you a hard time this time.
Me: Well, you do have my number and can call me if you want go out :) Yes I did just tell him to pick up the damn phone if he wants to ask me out.
George: Sounds good. Have a good night

I'm sorry, but I think I deserve someone to be a gentleman and call me on the phone and ask me out on a proper date. Is that asking too much??! I think not.

And before my mom or grandma or anyone that has been married more than 5 years decides to comment on this post about how I was too mean to him, let me save you the trouble and ask for you not to comment.

Because LITERALLY AS I WAS TYPING THIS POST, this is what just happened:

George: Hey. You busy?
Me: Nope. Just checking emails I was NOT about to tell him I was blogging about him.
George: Good. Just checking.

Man.. I give up.



15 comments:

Brooke said...

Go Nat! I'm totally on your side with this one . . . and sadly it seems he still didn't get the point.

Rae said...

I haven't commented in a while but I'm still reading and still love your posts. I know this wasn't the point of the post, but I love that you mentioned that anyone who's been married over five years shouldn't comment, because it's so true. Of course there's exceptions but I'm finding the longer my friends and family are married, the less they remember what it's like to be single.
Good luck with this guy. Sheesh.

Beth Clayton said...

I can't wait to see what Ginny has to say about this!

rawhide said...

Really?!? Really. I love that he texted you again the next night and asked how you were doing. Ha. I hate texting and dating. And now all i gotta ask is...who is GEORGE??? bahahahah!!!

AshEnds said...

yeah I don't think he has the balls to be your man, he sounds like he would either be a big push over or never get really into anything passionately which would totally frustrate you and all your readers.

Older (wiser, too) said...

Beth: Are you crazy? Remember I'm only 4' 10".

Older (wiser, too) said...

P.S. Beth, I know you're not crazy. But neither am I.

The Tingey's said...

HA! Good for you! Men these days need to buck up! Where's the chivalry gone?? I have lost my blogging bug...it was nice to read your always entertaining posts. Hope you are doing well (with George aside).

alisa said...

this post just made me miss your emails. sad.

Kim / Belly Button and Co. said...

nat... who is george? is george good lookin'? could he be on the desk of love? i mean that kind of good lookin? you keep going with that jane austen kind of attitude... texting isn't a formal flattering gesture of woo'ing...

Natalie said...

Kim...
George does NOT deserve to be on the "desk of love". He's cute, but his apparent lack of any sort of dating skills have officially turned me off. Poor guy.

Penel said...

George doesn't sound like he would fit in the family anyway. The fam has your back!

Cami said...

Can you please put more fun texting conversations on your blog? That was wonderful. But only because I can relate. Well done for being so blunt. These whimps(males) need help these days. :)

Nicole said...

i've been married for almost eight years and i say you weren't mean enough. :) you crack me up.

Sarah said...

Hahaha - SOOOOOO been there. I just stumbled across your blog. Girl. You write how I think. :)