Tuesday, January 13, 2009

And you thought your badazzler only worked on material

Last month I hit up my dad for two Jazz tickets that I could auction off at my ward Christmas party. After I auctioned them off, I went back to him and asked him to give me the other two. You know, just for me. To use. Without donating money.* He gave them to me like any good father would do.

Last night was said jazz game. I brought Mackenzi. No surprise there. Why bring a boy that I don't like when I can bring my best friend and we can laugh the whole night at the people around us? We were lucky enough to sit behind a lady that bedazzled her cleavage. No lie. The chick had meticulous placed a jewel right in the crux of her cleav. Classy.

Kenz and I wore our jazz jerseys to support. During half time when we went to go find healthy food, and by healthy food I mean a greasy pizza and an extra large hot dog, we stopped to enter a drawing. Don't ask me why I did this. I still don't know what I even entered to win. But at one point we were standing there (in our matching Jazz jerseys) and this guy comes up to us and is all, "Can you guys give my friend your autographs?" I look at him and am all, "What?" And he was all, "My friend down there, this is his first Jazz game so can you give him your autographs?" Um, dude, I'm confused?? Kenzi notices my bewildered expression and is all, "Why do you want our autographs?" Dude goes, "Aren't you guys Jazz dancers?"

Um, no. No. NO. And NO!

Seriously? Was it my greasy ponytail or my day old make up that made me look like a jazz dancer? Do tell. Newsflash Clueless Dude, about 1,000 other chicks are wearing jazz jerseys around you. Geez.

And finally, leave it to my dad to give me the best laugh of the night. He happened to also be at the game in his client's seats. When I text him and asked him where he was sitting, this was his response:

Look at the camera in the corner of the court across the court and to your right

Wft?

My response:

Kiddy corner would have worked.

Case in point - never ask a man for directions.


*For the record, I did donate money at my ward Christmas party. I bought a Progressive Spa Package from my friends Justin and Adam. Once I cash in on that prize I'll blog about it. I am sure.

7 comments:

Kim said...

You left out the best part of my text message however, imploring the Kiss Cam to land on you.

MandoRama said...

Ooooh! That is so cute when old people text! What a darling dad you have.

Let the Good Times Roll said...

you should have taken a picture of the bedazzled cleavage!

Kelsey said...

Sadly... that isn't a bedazzle effect! It's not a sticker, not a glued on gem... she probably had it surgically implanted into her bone. No joke. I have a friend who did it. Freakin insane.

But, hey... let's not continue to feign surprise that the kid thought ya'll were Jazz dancers... you're too sexy for your jersey, and you know it. :)

horsley home said...

you don't really know me... in fact, I don't know you. I link to your blog off Christine's and just wanted to tell you that I think you are hilarious!very very funny. Good job on that.

Christian and Brooke Bowers said...

So we need to chat and catch up but I had to comment cause this was hilarious and I too was disappointed there was no pic of the bedazzled cleave:) Miss you!

Natalie said...

I tried about 5 times to take a picture of the badazzled boob. So sad I failed.

And "horsley home". I think I have actually met you once. I went to high school with Dru. Everyone knows everyone somehow in this crazy blog-o-sphere. Thanks for the comment. Stop by anytime.