One day, I hope to be in the black

As of late, many people have asked me how on earth I have been able to take all my recent vacations. I've seriously wonder this myself. I mean, I did have to create a presentation that included charts and graphs, which I presented to my boss on why Agency X should let me go on a cruise AND Lake Powell within a month from each other- but besides that I am not sure. I must be pretty good at my job because they let me go on both. I was told that I would be chained to my desk after Lake Powell though. There's always a catch.

Maybe once a quarter Agency X gives each employee a little slip that lets them know what their PTO balance is. This act immediately prompts the great competition among employees on who has more vacation time. I have never won this competition. But today, I won for who has the least amount of vacation time:

You see that astounding NEGATIVE 55 hours? Yea, those were some good hours away from the office. At least our finance director gave me a smiley face on my slip. What is the purpose of this? Is she laughing at me? Is she happy that I wasn't here? Is she happy that I won't be able to leave this office for THE REST OF MY LIFE?

In my next review when I am asked what Agency X can to do improve I will tell them one thing: GIVE ME MORE PTO.